Monday 28 March 2016

The Butterfly Effect

  Little things have huge impacts.
 In the past few days, a couple of incidents led me to believe in this phenomenon.

    Death affects us in different ways. Some become very quiet and reclusive after the death of a dear one, whilst others cry copious tears and move on. My maternal grandfather passed away many years ago, but till today my mother seems inconsolable, a part of life’s joys seem to have dwindled for her. I am more reticent in this respect, but I do miss few people terribly, who are no longer with us.
A month back, I saw my parents off at the railway station after a short stay at my home. I was sad, no doubt, but went on with the day’s chores and came back to a quiet evening with family. Suddenly we received a message and my husband rushed to the next building – one of our neighbors had been found dead in his flat. It was a silent heart attack. He was alone, his wife had delivered a baby boy 2 months back and was at her maternal home. We hardly knew the couple, just saw or greeted each other at social functions held in the society. But the incident seemed to disturb us at the very core, we stayed up all night talking about the implications for the wife and child, who would have no memory of his father. His wife was a homemaker, were her finances taken care of, would she be able to pay off the home loan. We talked of his smoking habit; he looked fit for his age – was he stressed and never realized it, or was it the lack of exercise and lifestyle problems that afflict every second professional these days. An over analysis no doubt, but realization of our own mortality really gives us perspective. For the next few days we talked about how we should eat well, plan for emergencies, get preventive health checkups, do some good for the society, and the like. It was as if someone had jolted us awake from a  deep  slumber.

Whilst we were contemplating how to prepare for the inevitable, there were more pressing matters at hand.

The daycare center where I have been sending my daughter for the past 3 years was closing down due to some logistics issue, and we had been given notice of a month to shift our children elsewhere. It was unimaginable to lose a place we trusted blindly, and they cemented our trust with their small and large acts of  compassion for the child's needs.Initially we did not worry much about a replacement, as new centers had been sprouting left, right and center in the neighborhood. So after a relaxed couple of weeks, we began the actual hunt. There were few rejections initially, and lots of discussion on a few, but none seemed to fit the bill. We were mostly looking at places wanting to make a quick buck from the hapless parents – some were unhygienic, some cramped, some not providing meals, some providing all the facilities but lacking a personal approach. For an issue as sensitive as leaving your child with total strangers for the entire day, no one seemed to have thought of how they would earn the parents’ trust. Or maybe they knew they didn’t have to, their centers would still be full. It is heartbreaking to be separated from a bunch of people so selfless and caring, and we are feeling incapable of moving on.However, such is life and within a week we must look for a new daycare, our hopes pinned on the unknown.